Things are better in some regard now. I can't sleep, so I'm blogging. I tried the power standing chair (power stand, but a manual chair.) and surprisingly after using it for a few says, my vote is no. I like it and standing at work is awesome (I miss walking like.... a lot and I thought this might help), but it just isn't practical and if I'm paying $17,000 it better be practical. Here's the thing, it weighs 50 pounds and is a major pain to get in/out of so.... it just isn't what I expected. That's ok, though. You can't know until you try.
My shoulder has also been bad lately and I am back to fighting daily pain and headaches/migraines.
Just thought I would update and say that things are better!
Please pray that my shoulder calms down, we can get driving stuff started ASAP, and that I begin to feel less stress and anxiety.
"He's not jaded or bitter, he's gonna leave the givin' up for the quitters."
J
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Sometimes....
I want to give up. I want to tell people to stop being so useless, unsupportive, stupid, and downright shitty.
I get tired of excuses and apologies.
This all started yesterday when a friend and I went to watch some fireworks. As soon as we got there one of his friends asked as he was getting my chair out of the car "Is that a stroller?" Stupid question #1. Then she says "That's pretty high-tech." Ok, whatever. Then I get my chair and she starts pushing me without asking if it's ok. Stupid move #1. Then, she says "Oh, I've always wanted to do this." and starts asking my friend questions about me like I'm not even there. I HATE when people do that. I understand that people can be ignorant but, there's a difference between ignorance and stupidity. Then she had invited us back to her house for a bon fire and her mom goes well I didn't know there was a chair involved. Excuse me? I'm sitting in that chair right in front of you. Fully capable of hearing and comprehending every word you say.
I'm sick of friends slowly drifting away. Sick of feeling like an inconvenience to everyone. Sick of fighting with insurance. Sick of being stressed and anxious all the time. Sick of things being frustrating and tiring. Sick of the lack of therapy. I feel like I've written this post a time or two and I will write an upbeat and positive one at some point soon because there is ALWAYS good somewhere. I just need to vent.
As a side note, I am going to try some standing chairs on Monday. Please pray that insurance will be willing to fund the chair (the power chair/ power stand is like $40,000!)
Thanks for listening or reading or... whatever you wanna call it :)
J
" He's not jaded or bitter, he's gonna leave the givin' up for the quitters."
p.s... This is a need to listen :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebEdMGJRHY8&ob=av2e
I get tired of excuses and apologies.
This all started yesterday when a friend and I went to watch some fireworks. As soon as we got there one of his friends asked as he was getting my chair out of the car "Is that a stroller?" Stupid question #1. Then she says "That's pretty high-tech." Ok, whatever. Then I get my chair and she starts pushing me without asking if it's ok. Stupid move #1. Then, she says "Oh, I've always wanted to do this." and starts asking my friend questions about me like I'm not even there. I HATE when people do that. I understand that people can be ignorant but, there's a difference between ignorance and stupidity. Then she had invited us back to her house for a bon fire and her mom goes well I didn't know there was a chair involved. Excuse me? I'm sitting in that chair right in front of you. Fully capable of hearing and comprehending every word you say.
I'm sick of friends slowly drifting away. Sick of feeling like an inconvenience to everyone. Sick of fighting with insurance. Sick of being stressed and anxious all the time. Sick of things being frustrating and tiring. Sick of the lack of therapy. I feel like I've written this post a time or two and I will write an upbeat and positive one at some point soon because there is ALWAYS good somewhere. I just need to vent.
As a side note, I am going to try some standing chairs on Monday. Please pray that insurance will be willing to fund the chair (the power chair/ power stand is like $40,000!)
Thanks for listening or reading or... whatever you wanna call it :)
J
" He's not jaded or bitter, he's gonna leave the givin' up for the quitters."
p.s... This is a need to listen :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebEdMGJRHY8&ob=av2e
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